First Valentine’s Day after divorce

It’s Valentine’s Day in less than a week!

My first Valentine’s Day after divorce and what would have been my 20th Wedding Anniversary.

Yes, I got married on Valentine’s Day.  A lovely romantic idea – a wedding on February 14th.  Until you get divorced, then it is a little less pleasant when you see red roses and hearts everywhere reminding you of not just one but two special dates.


This Valentine’s Day, as my 20th Wedding Anniversary, should have been a big celebration.  Maybe we would have gone out for a meal or to the theatre.  Maybe we would have taken some time out to go for a romantic walk and stopped at a pub for lunch.  We would have certainly given each other  gifts – one for our anniversary and one for Valentine’s Day – and maybe they would have been a little more than usual with the special anniversary.

However, I won’t be receiving any cards or gifts this year (for obvious reasons) so I am considering doing something else, just for me.

Instead of feeling down about the whole Valentine’s Day and Wedding Anniversary combo, I am thinking of buying myself something.  (I hope that doesn’t sound pathetic.)

For previous wedding anniversaries, I have bought my now ex-husband a couple of cards and gifts.  It has usually taken a lot of time trying to think what he would really appreciate, going out and buying it, wrapping it etc.  Giving a Valentine’s Day/Wedding Anniversary is meant to be all about the other person to show them how much you love them.

Well, this year, instead of thinking about him, I can think about the positives of being single, how far I have come since our split and be selfish by getting myself a little treat to mark this.

So what should I buy myself?  I have drawn up a shortlist but I am open to other ideas – in fact, please do send me ideas as Valentine’s Day is getting close and my shortlist is a bit on the short side!

1.  A Ring – I am still touching my wedding ring finger and, for a split second or two, I wonder where my ring is until it dawns on me again.  I would have thought that this would have stopped by now but it hasn’t.  So I am wondering whether I should get a replacement for that finger but I need to make it look nothing like an engagement ring, which is my concern about this idea.  I love this Trollbeads ring but there aren’t any retailers near me.  However, it is a ring of sorts is a possibility.

trollbeads ring

2.  A Painting – I have always loved a painting in one of my friends houses which was painted by her father-in-law, Roger Hann.  I love the sun peeking through the clouds suggesting hope and the beach scene.


3.  A Sling – I sold a few slings before moving to raise funds but have been peeping at some of the facebook slings-for-sale pages and would love another one to try before Alex gets too old to be carried in a sling.  The obvious downside to this present to myself is that it has a short lifespan of use (unless I have another baby in the future!) but there are such gorgeous prints out there.

sling stash

4.  Anyone got any other ideas?  I would love to hear them

So as a fairly new divorced woman on Valentine’s Day, I say to all other single people, love yourself, treat yourself and be a little selfish.  You deserve it!

Mami 2 Five

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13 Comments on First Valentine’s Day after divorce

  1. Sara (@mumturnedmom)
    February 15, 2015 at 8:42 pm (4 years ago)

    I hope you got through the day okay, and that you have decided what to buy. I think something that is with you always as a positive reminder sounds good. Do like the suggestion of a Pandora bracelet, I have one and I love that each charm means something.
    Sara (@mumturnedmom) recently posted…The Prompt: Week 55My Profile

  2. martyn
    February 15, 2015 at 2:53 pm (4 years ago)

    Good post. How did you find it? This is the 3rd year separated and first divorced. I’ll be honest I find it difficult. I still touch my ring finger. A lot less than I use to but I still do. I’ve never thought about getting myself a gift so might do this next year. I would have gone for the painting personally or even a spar day. Have a good pamper session.
    martyn recently posted…Valentines Day 2015My Profile

  3. Jenny
    February 11, 2015 at 8:32 pm (4 years ago)

    This is absolutely amazing I say buy your self a gift and a spa pamper too! Why not love yourself as much as you would someone else on such a date. You are inspiring and so strong for it too. Great post. Thank you ever so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme
    Jenny recently posted…Valentine’s Day Chocolate Hearts Cake RecipeMy Profile

  4. Laura @ Life with Baby Kicks
    February 11, 2015 at 6:42 pm (4 years ago)

    Definitely a ring, it’s a great statement and it is with you at all Times if you need a pick me up you can look at it or touch it and get the strength /confidence you need and a painting is big to carry!!
    Laura @ Life with Baby Kicks recently posted…Food for thought; Steak PieMy Profile

  5. Louise
    February 11, 2015 at 2:02 pm (4 years ago)

    Sounds like this weekend will be tough but love how you are focusing on the positives and being able to enjoy treating yourself. Those three present ideas are all gorgeous – agree with the other suggestions of a spa day to have some relaxing time for yourself as another option. Hope this weekend will be gentle to you x
    Louise recently posted…To us on the day we became heart parentsMy Profile

  6. normaleverydaylife
    February 11, 2015 at 1:09 pm (4 years ago)

    This will definitely be a hard weekend for you. I like the idea of buying something lasting for yourself like the ring or the painting!
    normaleverydaylife recently posted…Traveling Through the Teenage YearsMy Profile

  7. Jess Paterson
    February 11, 2015 at 11:59 am (4 years ago)

    It sounds like a tough time for you and I am so impressed you are taking such a positive attitude. I really like that Trollbeads ring – maybe you should tweet them this post and see if they gift you it? I hope you have a lovely weekend and treat yourself as you deserve. #sharewithme
    Jess Paterson recently posted…How Rats Can Spice Up Your MarriageMy Profile

  8. mummyofboygirltwins
    February 9, 2015 at 1:07 pm (4 years ago)

    Love this! Buy yourself something very nice and enjoy it! It is sad when a relationship /marriage breaks up and things are bound to remind you of this forever. I hope you have a good day – and remember it’s just a day! Happy shopping 🙂 Jess #sundaystars
    mummyofboygirltwins recently posted…Storage solutions for toys in our homeMy Profile

  9. Sabrina
    February 8, 2015 at 8:44 pm (4 years ago)

    Woah V-Day is a double-whammy for you – so you are definitely not be selfish by treating yourself! The ring is a great idea – go for it and stay strong. Maybe do something special with your beautiful kids. Lots of love xx
    Sabrina recently posted…A Toddler’s Winter Guide to MadridMy Profile

  10. Katrina Chambers
    February 8, 2015 at 6:23 pm (4 years ago)

    Bless you, it must be very hard. Great idea to buy yourself something, be your own valentine. Perhaps an experience would be a nice idea? A massage or similar spa type of experience? Afternoon tea with a friend? I prefer experiences over presents, but you choose what you would prefer.
    Kat x
    Katrina Chambers recently posted…The Theory of Everything Film ReviewMy Profile

  11. Helen oldham
    February 8, 2015 at 4:07 pm (4 years ago)

    I’m showing as anonymous – I’m a bit new to blog posting lol

  12. Anonymous
    February 8, 2015 at 4:05 pm (4 years ago)

    Sounds a fab idea to me. I wear an eternity ring bought for my sons birth on my wedding finger – so I like the ring idea. Maybe a Pandora bracelet and over time you could treat yourself to a charm to represent each child. Spa day out??

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